Trigger warning in effect

On the British version of Big Brother a question was asked:

“Would you date a trans woman?”

The question is simple but it hides a much deeper conversation. The correct answer would be of course not. (Please feel free to trigger yourself now.) People will assume this is transphobic without even understanding the very question itself. The problem is that this is all such a new subject that is finally entering into mainstream that we have forgotten the lessons of the past.

In the 60tys, in the American South, (Similar laws were also in effect in South Africa extending until the end of Apartheid.)It was illegal to marry someone who was of a different race or color. The correct term was “Miscegenation,” that forbids the marriage of whites with blacks. In cruder terms, it has been called jungle fever, Asian Rage, Hispanic Panic and so on. So let’s rephrase the question, would you date a black woman? Well since most people are not racist, they would answer yes.  And they would be missing the point of the question and their answer would be racist.  The distinction here is best summed up by the following question. Can a Jesuit pray while smoking? Or is it he may smoke while praying? But those are the same question, are they not? In fact, the answer is they are not. A Jesuit may do what he wants so long as the emphasis is on the praying not on the smoking. Nothing should be in the way between a priest and his God, so the pray must be the thing of important, the smoking is therefore incidental. Back to the dating a “Black” women. Is the emphasis in the question based on the person? Or is it on the race of the person. They are speaking of a “Black” not dating the women, but the skin colour, just as the original question is based on the “Trans” not the woman part. Thus the question itself is wrong. The only person who would answer “Yes” is called a “Tranny Chaser,” someone who is into the sexual fetish of dating Trans people and had no intention of dating a real person. Similar to the person dating some women who is “Black,” they are ignoring the person in favour of the emphasis on the colour. And this is racist.

The better question would be; “Would you date a women who happens to be…” (Insert ethnic, cultural, or any other feature you might wish to separate from the larger collective called women.)

The question thus becomes, would you date a women who happens to be transgender. Providing there is mutual attraction and appropriate ages are observed, (That means you Roy Moore!) then the answer is yes because the person under discussion is addressed  not as an issue and not as a statement but as a person. And “persons” are who we date, not abstractions and classifications. Date by personality not by fetish.